My Bloody Valentine 3-D

Risible, gore-saturated horror tale in which the sheriff (Kerr Smith) of a small mining town suspects his wife's (Jaime King) old flame (Jensen Ackles) of committing a series of ax murders around Valentine's Day. Director Patrick Lussier's slipshod updating of the "O"-classified 1981 film of the same title (minus the 3-D) puts current technology to questionable use, with body parts and blood flying off the screen willy-nilly. Pervasive gory violence, strong sexual content, including brief but graphic nonmarital sexual activity, one scene of extensive full female nudity, frequent rough and crass language, and some use of profanity. O -- morally offensive. (R) 2009

My Bloody Valentine 3-D (Full Review)

Claustrophobics beware. "My Bloody Valentine 3-D" (Lionsgate) is a gore-saturated addition to the horror genre that feels as uncomfortable and confining as the mines in which many of its queasy killings are set.

The risible, sketchy plot -- which barely serves to string those gruesome scenes together -- centers on a love triangle involving small-town sheriff Axel Palmer (Kerr Smith), his wife, Sarah (Jaime King), and her old flame, Tom (Jensen Ackles).

Ten years after causing a Valentine's Day mining accident that killed five, and turned the lone survivor into an ax murderer, Tom returns from self-imposed exile only to find himself suspected in a series of crimes with a similar MO -- the new killer wears a miner's uniform and a gas mask and leaves behind grisly holiday-themed clues -- just as that now-dead survivor had.

Director Patrick Lussier's slipshod updating of the "O"-classified 1981 film of the same title (minus the 3-D) features much gratuitous nudity and puts the latest 3-D technology to questionable use, with body parts and blood flying off the screen willy-nilly.

These movies have been evaluated for artistic merit and moral suitability by the media reviewing division of Catholic News Service. The reviews include the CNS rating, the Motion Picture Association of America rating, and a brief synopsis of the movie.

The classifications are as follows:

A-I -- general patronage;
A-II -- adults and adolescents;
A-III -- adults;
L -- limited adult audience, films whose problematic content many adults would find troubling. L replaces the previous classification, A-IV.
O -- morally offensive.

Note: Some movies previously were designated A-IV. Older films with this classification should be regarded as classified L.